Private island.

I don't know if everyone is like this, but occasionally I find that getting "out" of whatever the usual is - and I mean physically away, not just zoning out in front of the TV (granted, I do plenty of that given the time and DVD sets) or breaking routine with a new restaurant (I also do as much of possible of this), or whatever - and, i mean for a vacation, not for a nonstop hectic work trip with "goals" and an "itinerary" - even if it's just for 36 hours, and even if you have to do some work and think about your work frustrations while away,* and even if you get seasick and, on the way there on top of the seasickness, have a touch of food poisoning or salmonella or botulism or something from the chocolate chip cookie dough you ate while making a hostess gift for the lovely friends of your uncle who hosted the weekend (so can't eat or drink anything, despite the free flowing food, wine, and liquor, until day 2), even then, it makes such a difference for one's feelings of calm, self-efficacy, and optimism.


http://www.kaliage.co.id/kaliage_kecil.html

It was just like it says, except, no croissants. One of the hosts and most of the guests were Indonesian, so, rice. There was toast too though, that was nice.

Also, I realized that exactly a year ago today I was on a private island off the coast of Belize as part of the pre-wedding festivities of some very dear friends. Their 1st wedding anniversary is May 30th - happy anniversary, you two! You know who you are.

A private island per year seems like a pretty decent average and I'm committing now to maintaining or increasing that average in the future.

Love you,
M

*it's fine, i am a trained social worker, i have handled other people's delusions before --- and, that time, the post office was out to get her and a blue angel was talking at him from the ceiling. a garden variety inflated ego's got nothing on me. (see how confident i sound after my little get away?)

NTT was sort of magical.

Hello there

I got back from NTT a week ago though I still haven’t "processed" (air quotations) the trip  - I went straight from it into a training in Jakarta, in which I led a 4 hour closed-door reflection session/focus group with the 7 regional coordinators and a 9 hour workshop for them and the program coordinators on program planning, fundraising, and proposal writing, in Indonesian (none of which I felt prepared for although I busted my ass that week to be prepared enough to fake the rest). Oh and scrambling to finish a $2.5 million proposal whose May 20th deadline I was informed of on May 18th.

Then on to a busy weekend, kicked off by a visit with some office mates to a water park - think lazy river and water slides. I was a bit skeptical but had a lot of fun especially after I understood that not only was it fine that all I had to wear were running pants and a men’s undershirt, I would have been glaringly inappropriate in anything much more revealing. I'm sure my itchy skin today has nothing to do with the state of sanitation at the water park. I'm positive. Total 100% confidence.

But anyway, for the almost 2 weeks before the training I was in the province of NTT, Nusa Tenggara Timur, which translates to East Southeast Islands. (Obviously.) More specifically, I was on Adonara, which is its own island seperate from the island of Flores - yet still part of the district of East Flores. (OB-viously.)

 

Look Adonara up quickly.... Oh wait, there’s like no information about Adonara anywhere. Including in Adonara itself, apparently; I went on a Rp.50,000 motorcycle special mission to one of the government offices in the big town on Waiwerang to see the map of Adonara that was apparently the only available on the island and found the map at right. 

What I can tell you is Adonara is maybe 20 x 20 miles (that's a pretty rough guess) and has a population of 20,000 - I feel like that's from Wikipedia. Its population is about 50% Catholic, 25% Muslum, and 25% Protestant - but 100% (or 99% - there are some people who married in from other places who live there) of the Lamahalot ethnic group, which identity supercedes the religious ones by a long shot. Economy based on fishing and agriculture (that's my guess anyway); tightly bound though partriarchal communities in which male hereditary customary leaders still hold a lot of away, along with the elected village and subdistrict leaders and religious leaders. Education outcomes are pretty low especially for girls- the outliers make it to high school and even making it to middle school is noteworthy. Housing ranges from bamboo walls and dirt floors, to full whitewashed brick, with half-brick half-bamboo and/or cement floors in the middle. Its a big deal to have a bathroom and cooking is done over a wood fire. Food is not traditionally rice based but Suharto f'ed that up pretty good so now the staple food is rice mixed with corn and occasionally root starches - and fish.

dinner at one of the Center



cooking



 Other than the utimately misguided map venture, the trip was a smashing success. Not that I went into it with particular expectations or standards, but I learned a lot about myself, the organization’s model, strengths, and weaknesses, and the area; benefited the local program according to the participants and staff – by my mere presence (foreigner; white) and by leading reflection processes with various parts of the organization as part of my research, connected with some dear and inspiring people; and enjoyed myself besides. All in all I think that qualifies the trip as a success, right?

Oh and I  spoke nothing but Indonesian to whole time including while running focus groups for up to 44 people and interviewing government officials and religious and customary leaders... Half the time it had to be translated in the local language by someone who understood my version of Indonesian, and back again – so that was really fun for everyone – but still.

The main personal lessons were the following: 1) I loved the sort of immersion field research I was doing and quite possibly have a knack for it. 2) Do bring hand sanitizer, lots of it, to the field. 3) Even fresh- from-the-sea grilled fish gets old after the 12th meal in a row.

The main research lessons, I haven’t quite sorted out yet, but a few initial ones are that 1) although the NTT program overall is cited as a “success story” for my organization the "success" there compared to other regions is due mostly to the cohesive and engaged social structures and community self-help mechanisms that existed in the area well before any program plopped in, rather than to anything the organization has done and 2) in fact, it's one particular subdistrict within NTT that is exeptional compared to other parts of the country in terms of its level of broader community mobilization and impacts and grassroots-driven activities above and beyond savings and loans, and that difference rests mostly on the field staff member who supports activities in that subdistrict and her exceptional creativity, initiative, dedication, and longevity. (And when I say she's exceptional, I mean, out-of-this-world amazing since really I haven't met a field staff member yet who isn't exceptional, and I just spent 13 hours in training sessions plus meals and bedtime with 7 out of 19 of them.)

What did I actually do to arrive at these conclusisions, though, you’re asking yourself? As I’m feeling lazy and have another insane week I am unprepared for starting today I’ll just let you read my daily log from NTT itself.

2 notes of explanation first –

1) a FGD is a focus group discussion, of which I did a bunch with the village level savings and loans group that form the basis for my organization’s program as well as one big one with the corps of "kaders" for NTT  - see below. [These were anywhere from 20-44 people. Actually a proper FGD should be like 8-12 people but I wasn't in a position to be enforcing textbook standards. I asked for groups and the field staff figured out which groups were meeting and that was the way it went.]

2) These groups are supported by “kaders,” which translates as “cadres” but that sounds creepy in English so I’ve decided for my write ups I’m just going to use the Indonesian and explain that “kaders” are members of the program who receive leadership training and also training in specialized priorities areas (eg teaching literacy, DV case advocacy, gender budgeting) and who operate as service providers or activists (ie apply their training – eg teach classes, or work with cases, or advocate to government at budget meetings) on a subdistrict, district, or provincial level – rather than sticking at the village level within the safe confines of their “home” group like most members.


3 Mei.
4:15 am to airport, throw up outside the terminal from taking anti-malarials on an empty stomach, to Kupang, to Maumere. Grilled fish in Maumere with the Jakarta crew. Drive to Larantuka... hang at hotel.



before



after

  



being greeted

4 Mei.
3 day-long Regional Forum starts. I cannot believe this was one day. It feels days and days long. The formal greeting in the a.m.; speeches; in the auditorium endlessly. Nice to be in room of women with their hair showing though – and there’s even legs showing on the street, and arms. Lunch – fish, red rice, pineapple from heaven.


5 Mei.
Another day that already feels like 5, and we have to go back for Cultural Night. Let’s see... up at 6, bit of laundry and a shower (by which I mean mandi, which is essentially a bucket bath and is how most Indonesians bathe, at least outside of Jkt they do), breakfast in my room and stuff – over there at 8. To be changed into a traditional woven sarong that I wore until the rally, obviously. I didn’t look at all ridiculous, especially since I was wearing a shirt that in absolutely no way matched – unlike everyone else who was elegantly matched. ... The special shout out by the chief of the district (“and I’d like the thank the lady from America for joining with us today”) in front of 200 people, and going up on stage for the wife of the governer to ring a gong...akward. Then the dialogues, then the interview w/ the lady from the district-level Women’s Empworment office – a more ironic name was never used, than when “empowerment” is in the name of an Indonesian government office - then the never-ever ending rally through town. Cultural night was amazing. Some Catholic youth ended the evening with country line dancing.

 

`

Cultural Night audience



Line dancing by Catholic youth.













6 Mei.

Writing this from Waiwerang, Adonara after a boat ride in whcih I was half actually seasick and half just wanted to zone out and stare out the window and not be photographed or chatted up. Came straight from the Regional Forum closing ceremonies. ... Led the 200+ ladies in a resounding round of Head Shoulders Knees and Toes as part of it all. ... Tired. Wishing I was in a hotel with a clean bathroom and sheets and the room to myself and control over when I eat and get water. But I’m in someone’s house sharing a room with a staff member and no idea where the bathroom even is much less if I’m going to get dinner tonight or if there’s potable water in the immediate radius. But its just because I’m tired and hot and annoyed about not having a say in what I ride, in the fact that I should have brought my helmet, with myself for bringing so much. Etc. It’ll be fine in the morning if I manage to get any sleep. ....//Later: Sudah mandi, sudah feel much better. [I bathed, I already feel much bettter.]

7 mei.

A.m...shower, breakfast etc (I introduced my colleages to the idea of a rice and avocado combo [they talked about it for more than a week after].) Then pickup ride to one of the women’s centers. (Um. Gorgeous. And I haven’t even seen the beach yet.) Really nice too, you can tell people take pride in it. Walked up the road to get Acqua (SERIOUSLY Indonesia is not good about the tourist thing. Besides the helmet frustration, no one, even Jakarta folks, thought to tell me that I should think about water, no one asked, do you need water? Or thought to say, this is how the bathrooms will be and you’ll share a bed with someone. I don’t particularly mind any of this but its the first time I’ve been anywhere where realizing the foreigner might not get whats up didn’t occur to people.) They call me Bule, or something in the local language, or mister (sometimes, sometimes mrs.) – or suster aka sister aka the title used by nuns here. .. Training today. Felt long, even though it wasn’t particularly. And then the interview from hell (the person couldn't really speak Indonesian very well, but insisted on doing it herself rather than asking 1 person to translate, and I can't really speak Indonesian very well either, and then instead of letting us fumble along peacefully, about 5 people tried to help with translation at once, which mostly meant putting words in her mouth for her answers and her shutting down completely when they start to really annoy her.) But at least  I and of the Jkt staff people, who I used to think didn't like me, are bonding of sorts. What with sharing a bed and hanging our undies next to each other to dry after washing.

8 mei.
To the beach in the morning. Feeling like I have a cold. Fried bananas and coffee aka sugar water for breakfast. Delicious though, all of it, including the beach. ... Training in the a.m., lunch, then to monitoring/focus group 1. ... What happened then? I think it was just a looong night of not much – some chatting/follow up with staff...

9 mei.
Up the mountain, focus group there. Gorgeous scenery, scary as hell ojek experience – no one’s fault, although I wished he wouldn’t keep trying to converse with me, but that’s one steep slope... Lunch up there. Totally can’t remember what I did after that, I think just worked on re-packing and typing up my notes so I could do follow up. Then interview with a customary village head. Then to bed eventually.

10 Mei.

Now this is a 5-in-one day for sure. Let’s see – up at 5:30 – to the white sand beach (lurrrrrvely) –debrief with a leader of the group from yesterday who wasn’t at the focus group, who has evolved into a leader on a subdistrict level; she cried because of the things the group said about why she has been able to take a leadership role (as in, what’s the secret – what factors allow her to do it as opposed to other women?). I’m quite sure they were tears because she was touched not because the group doesn’t like her but I probably should have confirmed my vocabulary first to make sure.... Then to the island’s other Center, then to another focus group [so annoyed on so many levels by that experience I can’t even express it properly right now. Long story short the buck stops with the kaders in terms of training reaching the group level. And the kaders REALLY need some training and direction in terms of providing group support and in facilitation.] .. then the village head, blah blah blah, then the village muslim leader and his wife – actually a pleasant interview, I was as fumbly as ever but I like him, not least because I like her and they seem pretty on equal footing based on the brief interaction.... All the meantime I’m constipated diarrheal and have an awful cold and having to shake everyone’s germy hand (Adonara? Not big on soap) and drink sugary nonpotable tea and eat what’s put in front of me or risk not properly menghormati-ing (honoring) everyone.

11Mei.
My internet worked! For about 10 minutes but still. ... Debrief the awful FGD from yesterday, then to subdistrict official office here and in Ile Boleng. The ojek driver who was hired for me for the day was warned multiple times this morning to be “sopan” (polite) and slow since foreigners are delicate flowers so he went about 15 miles an hour for most of the back and forth. (STILL hilarious, that.) - lunch in IB - eggplant, NOODLES!, egg... subdistrict office IB. RAIN oh my gosh. Interviewed some kaders and staff while hanging out waiting for the deluge to pass.... Back to the other center, to interview the priest [the candles along the path – Adonara is magical in these little ways, the graves mixed up with the houses, and always lit up somberly at night.] ... Back to Center to hang, tired tired tired.


12 Mei.
To the morning market. Bought too many weavings because I got one as a gift from a staff members’ mother who sells them at the market and then felt obligated plus...gorgeous stuff. Day at the Center– long interview with the regional coordinatory, then straight into a FGD with the entire body of kaders. It was hot and I was exhausted but I went hammy and they loved it. Then interviews, then, oof, deflated. What else that night? I did some typing,everyone else was passed out by 7”30 or 8.

13 Mei.
Apa ya? (What huh?) ... To a group FGD, in their little Center: one of the ladies gave me a gift of toothpicks, which she makes to sell. Then to the other groups in theeeeir little Center – really didn’t feel like it much but they were waiting (at least some of them were, based on the enthusiasm level I’d say not everyone cared all that much. ) Then fool’s errand to Waiywerang – um. Who thought that was a map and why was it up on the wall. It looked like someone’s unfinished middle school social studies project. Anyhoo. Back to home base, some study-buddying with the coordinator (fried dough! And coffee!), dinner, and then a debrief convo with her and neverending packing and one last shower and finally bed.


14 Mei.
Up just in time (ha – we left 2 hours later) ... breakfast, awkward paying for my place to stay/consumption (Adonara-ese are more akward about talking about money than my mother’s family is, and that’s pretty bad), buying even more sarongs... the women make them together in their groups and then sell them at the centers, including some from homespun and died thread - and then being given a sarong on top of it. Endless pick-up trip ride to the quick boat – still love being in the back...Ice Ice Baby driving through the bamboo. 

The quick boat, and a chicken tied to a motorcycle. To Larantuka where I discovered I had totally misunderstood the point of the political candidates “vision and mission” meeting (I thought the women I work with were giving them a training – but instead they’d been given dispensation to sit in the district government parking lot to listen to 3 hours of speeches via closed circuit tv) and that - under no uncertain terms - I had no desire to be there then under the miday sun listening to the candidates babble on. But I kept a little busy with ideas for the workshop next week and a proposal outline and tried to keep my cool (figuratively, I mean. There was no way to literally keep cool...Full sun at noon. What genius scheduled this thing?) Then lunch – chicken and rice, yummy, and I got the Coke I’d been craving since about the 5th, though the sambal was so spicy it sort of ruined it. Then “my” driver took us to the airport, and my new friends played Uno with me on the floor of the airport and waved me goodbye as I took off in the 16 seater plane.

Writing this in the plane while half watching the islands go by underneath me. I don’t feel anything in particular right right now, but I was sad to leave. I genuinely enjoyed everyone’s company, like for real, not ‘cause they’re very welcoming (although – incredibly so) and because I have to be gracious about being a guest. I would have dug hanging out there more. But. Not to be. Back to reality via Susi Air....

Love you, M